Let's say your ceremony starts at 5pm, and the reception ends at 10pm. Once the clock hits 5 o'clock, it's GO TIME.
The clock stops for nothing and nobody. Not for guests who arrive late, bathroom breaks, or the time wasted trying to figure out where Aunt Sara is.
The worst part? Your guests feel every bit of it. For example, Sunset Photos. Your guests are done eating and waiting to party, but the quick "10-minute" outside photo shoot is now almost 30 minutes. Everyone inside is bored stiff, waiting for you to come back into the room.
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Now you can see that wasting just a few minutes has a whole new meaning.
If you are going to change your wedding dress mid-reception, you might figure that takes five minutes. (I promise it's NEVER just 5 minutes). Figure 15-20 minutes, easy.
The fix. Change during dinner, before the dance floor opens.
You want to see everybody. You should! These people love you.
You think you'll spend a few minutes at each table (probably more). But even at just 3 minutes per table, that's 30 minutes for 10 tables.
30 to 45 minutes of your reception, gone.
The fix. Do a Photo Table Dash. See all your tables in the space of one song; your photographer snaps a photo of you both at each one. Then have fun on the dance floor!
Toasts are a wonderful tradition that you should embrace. But not too many.
3-4 toasts/speeches are the sweet spot, about 4 minutes each. More than that is risking taking away party time or boring your guests. You'll lose 4-5 minutes for every toast after the 4th one.
The fix. Four toasts, max. Everybody else who wants to say something can speak at your rehearsal dinner, where everyone is not "waiting" for the dancing to start.
Every wedding has a few of these, and none of them are bad things. You want them! The question isn't whether to book them, it's their location.
Here's the problem: Anything that pulls your guests out of the room is someone leaving the dance floor. Nobody leaves because they're bored, they leave because you gave them somewhere else to be.
Here are typical Dance Floor stealers:
The fixes. Put a cigar roller at your rehearsal dinner. (That's twice now the rehearsal dinner has solved a problem for you). The bar and photo booth? Keep them in the same room. Late night snacks? Handhelds are the way to go. If you're still touring venues, look for one that keeps everything in one room. Moving your guests from room to room to room all night is a real challenge, and it's a lot easier to avoid it than to fix it.
Here's a real easy way to know where the focus is going to be at your reception. It's on you, the couple. Wherever you are, that's where the party is.
Hang out at the bar and your guests will hang out at the bar. Step outside and they'll go looking for you. Get out on that dance floor and let loose, and guess what? They're right there with you, every single time.
Pick what your priority is. A packed dance floor, a crowded bar, or a room full of people sitting at their tables. You choose it by where you are. Everybody's looking at you both. Make it count.
Nobody thinks about this while they're touring wedding venues. Your DJ can be great and the songs can be perfect, but if the room is lit like a grocery store, you're already fighting an uphill battle. Think about these BEFORE booking your venue.
This is the biggest one by a mile. Every person is a bit anxious about being the first guest on the dance floor, but low light is what makes it okay. Under full house lighting, your reception feels like a corporate meeting instead of a party.
So visit your venue at night. Have them turn the lights on and walk the room, then ask what dims, how low it goes, and who's allowed to touch it once your reception starts. The worst offender is if they have only fluorescent lighting. It'll look like an office meeting at work.
The fix. See your venue at night, look at the different lighting levels, and ask about additional lighting from the venue (or your DJ).
A packed dance floor throws off real heat. A ballroom that feels perfect during dinner can be miserable an hour and a half later. You don't want your guests stepping out to cool off.
The fix. Find out who controls the thermostat that night and how to reach them. Have them take it down a few degrees right before dancing starts.
One bartender for 150 guests is a line all night, and everybody standing in that line is somebody who isn't dancing.
This one's different from everything else in here, because it does cost money. Not much, but it isn't free, so it's your call.
The fix. Ask your venue or caterer how many bartenders come with your package and what it costs to add one for the reception. Then decide if it's worth it to you.
Your dance floor should be right next to your DJ, with nothing in between. No guest tables, no cake table, no gift table.
When a venue or wedding planner places guest tables between the dance floor and DJ, odds are grandma and grandpa are sitting at the tables with LOUD speakers pointed right at their ears.
The fix. Ask your venue for the floor plan and check one thing. Is the dance floor touching the DJ? If it isn't, ask them to move it.